Saturday, December 29, 2012

Parental Dispositions

                        Darkened evening shadows descended gradually down celestial havens of mid-summer  complacency. Lackadaisical air-conditioned rendezvous; you and I commenced animated puppy-love beside your stepfather's garbage disposal. Seething sweat-filled concrete swimming-pools of corporeal perspiration; bloodline rashes itched and etched toward dry auburn patterns of rug-burnt July
                                 residential afternoon sofas with me and your family tabby shedding
                                                                   grey hairballs
                                                                        onto crimson
                                                                               furnished curtains
                                                                                  covering early afternoon breezes
                                                                                       sweeping through open screen-windows.
                                                       Your mother was an (whore) drunken recluse in her late thirties; scarlet and cushioned living-room love-seats spread fervently out below domesticated corridors.  Maternal cookie-cutter innuendos, martini-olive dinner-time cutlery- brandishing your deliberated childhood with 5:00 P.M. Moonlighting chicanery: initiating promiscuous schools of thought between the local Jews, Protestant barbers and already irate Catholic women-man she was a handful before her sister's wedding. She had a  razor-sharp shrieking voice that resounded itself way out beyond
                                                              remote backyard perimeters, past
                                                                             city street corners, perpetuating profane gasoline mirages of convenience store nativity. Your pale narrow wrist pressed impatiently to your warm upper-chin in middle class waiting rooms of young adulthood. You childishly wept like an rich man's daughter at unnecessary barmitzvas attended by nonpracticing sentimentalists; I loved how you'd allude to unpleasant periods in your life-as if you endured this time for somebody else
                                                                      at your own expense
                                                                               your expensive clothing and
                                                                                   your stale imagination's expanse neglected
                                                                                     to expand
                                                                                         beyond suburban outdoor clothes-lines; recreational apparel hung in late- August alignment and what if
                                                                   a routine sun's radiance refused to shine tomorrow;
                                                                     formidably declining itself to us with insidious                                                                                               vengeance                                                                                                                                                        like remember when I took a hunting-knife to your stepfather's throat a decade ago on an backdoor kitchen porcelain morning; I took his shitty head by his unkempt hair and bloodily smashed it into the molding floorboards; we were really just emotionally depraved adolescents square dancing amid
 midnight gymnasiums of September (never was a cloudy day); I took you home to your parents bedroom while they were on vacation from themselves in Disney Land 
                                                                                                              or  was it Wildwood or
                                                                                                                 who gives a Fuck?
                                                                                                                       I do, or did.
                                                                           We smeared sticky butterscotch on each others bare flesh amid lukewarm avenues of fleshy curves, intricate ridges and sweet aromas; a mid-afternoon ceiling fan breathed Hershey-kissing promises to your tepid asshole in sugary jests of lovemaking and
                  Fucking.
                     Then you confided in me surprisingly
                            that you always wanted to be a man
                             and I confided in myself
                                    that I was done with you.
                                                               

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